Susan C. Young

Why leave your success up to dumb luck or accident when you can take a stand, make a plan, and be proactive in your pursuits and possibilities?

Wouldn__ you like to arrive to any event or situation with a sense of confidence and ease that things are as they need to be?

Expect good things from people; they feel it. You never know who you are going to meet, and projecting approachability will open doors of opportunity for you that you may not have discovered otherwise.

As we explore this valuable non-verbal language, please note that these principles do not apply in many cultures around the world. In some cultures, direct eye contact may offend, affront, violate, or threaten.

Poised Positioning_ Be mindful of how you use your body to communicate._ Be fully present in the moment._ Be thoughtful and gracious in your actions._ Be fluid and elegant in your movements._ Express flow__alk in freedom and spontaneity._ Develop an unshakeable sense of authentic inner confidence and certainty._ Develop a deep respect for others._ Move slower and more deliberately._ Walk in integrity, class, and modesty._ Smile kindly and laugh softly._ Become a student of manners and etiquette.

Being culturally aware and respectful of others_ cultures will help you to keep the habit of making eye contact in context. As a matter of fact, in some parts of the world making eye contact can be construed as being exactly the opposite of what I am sharing in these pages. Making a great first impression is always about the specific environment and circumstance, isn__ it?

My friend Julie was cooking dinner in her kitchen one night. Her expression was blank as she stood alone working by herself. Her daughter walked in and gasped, __om! What__ wrong?_ She said __othing. I__ fine._ In response, her daughter added, __hen tell your face! You scared me!_ Emotional expressions can easily be misinterpreted when we are not aware of what people are seeing. Being deep in thought can look that way.

When you see someone smile, does it naturally make you want to smile back? When you are irritable, do you find that people mirror your irritability? When someone yawns around you, do automatically do the same? When you hear someone celebrating, do you feel inclined to join in and celebrate too? Your responses are not forced, but instinctual and empathetic.

Smiling is truly one of the most generous gifts you can give to another. You never know when your smile may inspire the sad, encourage the hopeless, heal a heart, or change someone's world for the better.

A strong handshake conveys confidence, clarity, strength, and intention. As with everything else in life, if it is overzealous, it may be seen as aggressive, arrogant, or dominating. A bone-crushing vice-grip is just plain obnoxious and one of the fastest ways to make someone angry.

Your eyes are the windows to your soul_ indeed. It is a cliché for a good reason__t is a timeless truth with universal application.

Proper posture conveys that you are ready to take command and master new situations. When you project this level of confidence, you will instill confidence in others.

What is acceptable on a personal level is very different from what is acceptable on a business level. When we utilize touch well, we can elevate our presentation, demonstrate respect, and convey confidence. However, when we use touch poorly, it can be disastrous, personally and professionally.

Your smile is a magnet for goodwill and positivity. In unison with your attitude, people gravitate to happy people!

Mirroring provides social cues through body language and behavior which enable us to develop more empathy and understanding for others.

Are you being approachable when you are around new people? Ever not know what to say? Simply smile when you make eye contact. This is a subliminal invitation to help others feel safe__llowing a conversation to follow naturally.

What are you projecting? How are you showing up? Are you aware of how your expressions are impacting your communication with others?

Trying to engage with an unapproachable person can lead to embarrassment, alienation, and resistance. Why would we set ourselves up for that kind of pain and failure? It__ no wonder that people may avoid them__he risk of rejection is too great.