We are all the product of our past and have to live with our memories and personality they cannot be erased.
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self-neglect
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Self-care is not selfish. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.
As a child you received messages from your family to keep your mouth shut and remain invisible. You also learned to become invisible in order to protect yourself. You no longer need to be invisible to survive. If people do not notice you, they may not abuse you, but they also will not love you or attend to your needs. Make yourself and your needs known.