Dan Pearce

Loving my son, building my son, touching my son, playing with my son, being with my son_ these aren__ tasks that only super dads can perform. These are tasks that every dad should perform. Always. Without fail.

I think it doesn__ matter if you or I or anybody else thinks homosexuality is a sin. It doesn__ matter if you or I think anything is a sin. It doesn__ matter if homosexuality is a sin or not. In fact, it doesn__ matter if anything anybody else does is a sin or not.Because sin is a very personal thing! It always has been and it always will be!And it has nothing to do with love.

Dads. Do your faces light up when you first see your child in the morning or when you come home from work? Do you not understand that a child__ entire sense of value can revolve around what they see in your face when you first see them?

Do you not realize that your kids are going to make mistakes, and a lot of them? Do you not realize the damage you do when you push your son__ nose into his mishaps or make your daughter feel worthless because she bumped or spilled something? Do you have any idea how easy it is to make your child feel abject? It__ as simple as letting out the words, __hy would you do that!?_ or __ow many times have I told you_

Dads. Do you not realize that a child is what you tell them they are? That people almost always become what they are labeled? Was whatever your child just did really the __umbest thing you__e ever seen somebody do_? Was it really the __ost ridiculous thing they ever could have done_? Do you really believe that your child is an idiot? Because she now does. Think about that. Because you said it, she now believes it. Bravo.

Dads. It__ time to tell our kids that we love them. Constantly. It__ time to show our kids that we love them. Constantly. It__ time to take joy in their twenty-thousand daily questions and their inability to do things as quickly as we__ like. It__ time to take joy in their quirks and their ticks. It__ time to take joy in their facial expressions and their mispronounced words. It__ time to take joy in everything that our kids are.

Don__ we get it? To put our arm around someone who is gay, someone who has an addiction, somebody who lives a different lifestyle, someone who is not what we think they should be_ doing that has nothing to do with enabling them or accepting what they do as okay by us. It has nothing to do with encouraging them in their practice of what you or I might feel or believe is wrong vs right.It has everything to do with being a good human being. A good person. A good friend.

Children are gifts. They are not ours for the breaking. They are ours for the making.

My request today is simple. Today. Tomorrow. Next week. Find somebody, anybody, that__ different than you. Somebody that has made you feel ill-will or even hateful. Somebody whose life decisions have made you uncomfortable. Somebody who practices a different religion than you do. Somebody who has been lost to addiction. Somebody with a criminal past. Somebody who dresses __elow_ you. Somebody with disabilities. Somebody who lives an alternative lifestyle. Somebody without a home.Somebody that you, until now, would always avoid, always look down on, and always be disgusted by.Reach your arm out and put it around them.And then, tell them they__e all right. Tell them they have a friend. Tell them you love them.If you or I wanna make a change in this world, that__ where we__e gonna be able to do it. That__ where we__l start.Every. Single. Time.

Dads. It__ time to show our sons how to properly treat a woman. It__ time to show our daughters how a girl should expect be treated. It__ time to show forgiveness and compassion. It__ time to show our children empathy. It__ time to break social norms and teach a healthier way of life! It__ time to teach good gender roles and to ditch the unnecessary ones. Does it really matter if your son likes the color pink? Is it going to hurt anybody? Do you not see the damage it inflicts to tell a boy that there is something wrong with him because he likes a certain color? Do we not see the damage we do in labeling our girls __om boys_ or our boys __eminine_ just because they have their own likes and opinions on things? Things that really don__ matter?

For twenty-one years, I have been paralyzed by the fear of what this society will do with me if they ever were to know of the thoughts that I continually push away. For more than two decades, I have made a choice to be straight. After all, it__ as easy as making a choice, isn__ it? This culture has made sure that I know that. Anyone who is anything other than straight was just someone deceived by the devil. He is unnatural. He is confused. He is mistaken. He is weak. He can control it if he desires to control it. Such a compelling and ongoing argument has been made that I have always trusted it.I believed that if I hid it long enough, and ran from it long enough, and refused to acknowledge it for long enough, I could indeed succeed at living up to their decrees. I believed that I could force myself to never be anything else.

You want to be popular? It__ easy to do. Just be a total weirdo and love yourself for it.

Make life easier for those around you, not harder.Every person you know is fighting their own great battle. Few of us ever know what those battles entail, and so often we say and do things that push others deeper and harder into the front lines of those battles. I know such has been the relentless lifelong reality for me.Love a person for the person that they are.Or dislike them for the person that they are.But don__ love or dislike them for the sole reason that they see people differently than you do. Don__ love or dislike them because they experience the world differently than you do.And please don__ eternally and wholly define them with sexual labels just because they were among those who finally found the courage to acknowledge their truth.

At the border of where I will literally not survive so long as I keep living in so much fear of the harsh judgments of others, I am finally conceding the truth to you all.I am finally conceding the truth to me.I am something other than straight.

If only I could change the world around me, perhaps my truth won__ one day be the end of me.

The world is so obsessed with defining sexuality for everyone and attaching labels to it. Any time any person openly leaves the sexual norm, their sexuality becomes, more often than not, the absolute defining characteristic of that person. It becomes the first thing people think about and often the first thing they mention. Every other part of that person all but disappears.

A lot of people don't like me. I take that as evidence that I have done something beautifully different or something extraordinary.

When someone points out your past mistakes, look at them dead in the eyes and follow with, 'and I__ do it all again to have the life I have now.