Earl Wilson

Courage is the art of being the only one who knows you're scared to death.

Home, nowadays, is a place where part of the family waits till the rest of the family brings the car back.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Isn't it a shame that future generations can't be here to see all the wonderful things we're doing with their money?

Always remember, money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it before talking such fool nonsense.

Benjamin Franklin may have discovered electricity, but it was the man who invented the meter who made the money.

You may not be able to read a doctor's handwriting and prescription, but you'll notice his bills are neatly typewritten.

Experience is what enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

The man who didn't want his wife to work has been succeeded by the man who asks about her chances of getting a raise.

Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.

Success is simply a matter of luck. Ask any failure.

Gossip is when you hear something you like about someone you don't.

He's an honest man - you could shoot craps with him over the telephone.

Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.

One way to get high blood pressure is to go mountain climbing over molehills.