Jeff Phillips

A beverage of leisure is a serious business,_ Shane Bowermaster was known to declare. __here can be no product of pleasure without the inverse on the end of the producer.

Their conversation ceased abruptly with the entry of an oddly-shaped man whose body resembled a certain vegetable. He was a thickset fellow with calloused and jaundiced skin and a patch of brown hair, a frizzy upheaval. We will call him Bell Pepper. Bell Pepper sidled up beside The Drippy Man and looked at the grilled cheese in his hand. The Drippy Man, a bit uncomfortable at the heaviness of the gaze, politely apologized and asked Bell Pepper if he would like one. __hy is one of your legs fatter than the other?_ asked Bell Pepper. The Drippy Man realized Bell Pepper was not looking at his sandwich but towards the inconsistency of his leg sizes. __ou always get your kicks pointing out defects?_ retorted The Drippy Man. __ust curious. Never seen anything like it before._ __ was raised not to feel shame and hide my legs in baggy pants._ __o you flaunt your deformity by wearing short shorts?_ __ike you flaunt your pockmarks by not wearing a mask?_ Bell Pepper backed away, kicking wide the screen door, making an exit to a porch over hanging a dune of sand that curved into a jagged upward jab of rock. __e is quite sensitive,_ commented The Dry Advisor. __ho is he?_ __ fellow who once manipulated the money in your wallet but now curses the fellow who does.