Salla Simukka

Longing was a feeling that was hard to live with. It didn__ ask permission. It didn__ pay attention to time or place. It was overwhelming and demanding, grasping and selfish. It clouded thoughts or made them too bright, too sharp. Longing demanded unconditional surrender. Lumikki tried to fight it and failed. She didn__ want to long and yet she longed. She didn__ want to remember, and yet her dreams and her body remembered, reminding her constantly.The longing was physical. It was dizziness. It was a seizing in her belly. It was the need to wrap her arms around herself alone in bed when there was no one else to do it for her. She felt the longing in her fingertips that yearned to stroke, to touch, to caress. The longing made her fingers restless, fiddling with the zipper of her jacket, the strings in her hoodie, fidgeting with whatever little thing happened to her hand. The longing made her teeth bite into her lower lip, leaving it chipped and almost bleeding. She knew she was being stupid. She knew her longing was pointless.

Do not seek power for revenge. Seek power in order to avoid situations that would make you want revenge.

For her a day of pampering meant comic books, black liquorice, serious exercise, veggie curry and, above all, solitude.