alcohol

I was glad to be made awarethat __eimke_ (jeune fille au pair),is subject to natural law,and can be made fat,by such things as poor diet,and alcohol.

At first I assumed he was a Mexican, but slowly began to realise that a real Mexican probably wouldn't be wearing a sombrero in a London nightclub. And he'd probably have a real moustache, not a stick-on one. A Mexican with a stick-on moustache would be like a Super-Mexican, because he'd have two moustaches, and that'd be cool, because a Super-Mexican could probably use his poncho as a cape, and then I realised I was saying all this to the man's face.

I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels.

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.

To alcohol! The cause of... and solution to... all of life's problems

Drinking is fun! It makes me feel horrible and sexy!

For the first twenty years of my life, I rocked myself to sleep. It was a harmless enough hobby, but eventually, I had to give it up. Throughout the next twenty-two years I lay still and discovered that after a few minutes I could drop off with no problem. Follow seven beers with a couple of scotches and a thimble of good marijuana, and it__ funny how sleep just sort of comes on its own. Often I never even made it to the bed. I__ squat down to pet the cat and wake up on the floor eight hours later, having lost a perfectly good excuse to change my clothes. I__ now told that this is not called __oing to sleep_ but rather __assing out,_ a phrase that carries a distinct hint of judgment.

This isn't champagne anymore. We went through the champagne a long time ago. This is serious stuff. The days of champagne are long gone.

My uncle would have about ten pints some nights and then drive us all home. I guess the feeling was that we weren't going to crash into anyone, because barely any fucker lived there.

I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.

We were not a hugging people. In terms of emotional comfort it was our belief that no amount of physical contact could match the healing powers of a well made cocktail.

There are two kinds of people I don't trust: people who don't drink and people who collect stickers.

Death: "THERE ARE BETTER THINGS IN THE WORLD THAN ALCOHOL, ALBERT."Albert: "Oh, yes, sir. But alcohol sort of compensates for not getting them.

Put down your glass, it is time to dance. If you want to get drunk all you need is to drink love. Put down your pipe and do away with these childish toys. If you want to get high all you need is to breathe love. Now, can I have this dance?

Like alcohol and poverty, a heartbreak has the power to make a man do something he wouldn__ normally do and to make a woman do someone she wouldn__ normally do.

It will all be over in 2 weeks

I wish I could think about nothing, but the books all the time. I have never had an alcoholic rampage because of thinking about books too much...

It began to falter not when the book publishers who loved books gave way to those who preferred profits to reading. It happened when publishers and editors cut back on their drinking. If there is one national flower in book publishing, it is the martini.