bittersweet

i have laughedmore than daffodilsand cried more than June.

Her eyes flashed, hot and angry, like lightening cutting through a red sunset.

Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter. Sweet. Alive.

I can tell you this: there will be other girls, other disasters. And there will be nights to come, his life mostly behind him, when he will long to hurt like that again.

Three, 300, or 3,000 - these are the number of unknown days, each far too little and yet too much at the same time, to see an irrevocably declined loved one languish and suffer, with that bittersweet release lingering in the doorway, but never quite being sent all the way in, to comfort and carry our loved one to that Better Place._ _ Connie Kerbs

I am happy with you." It was only a half-lie. In truth, being with him made me happier than anything. But it was a bittersweet happiness because from this moment on, it would be overshadowed with the wait and wonder of when and how our relationship would dissolve.

He wasn__ my boyfriend, but he was something. Someone who made a positive impact on my life regardless of the negative. He changed my perspective for the better and made me who I am in this very second. I appreciate, cherish, and thank him for it; and I will for this life and into any life that may come.

I realized I loved him after everything went wrong so I wallowed in self-pity and prayed I could wake up.

I loved everything to anything to everyone who surrounded him. He was perfect. A delusion with a sweet melancholy taste. He was crazy, but he was my crazy and inside, everything felt right.

But one day, when Toby is old enough, I will take down a shoe box from a shelf where it is kept, and I will tell him again the story of his sister, Isabel Margaret Cavendish, the girl who came before.

I ain__ scared to lend a handI ain__ scared to clench it either

I__ sorry I broke you. It__ just that you__e so pretty, and I break pretty things.

We were in ways I can__ seem to grasp. We moved like fluid, scattering our love throughout each other. We moved along, out of our eyes and through our veins. It was unintentionally and in turn, unconditionally.

I never expected to fall in love. I never expected to float or fall a thousand feet and create the crevice I called my life. But the thing with crevices, there__ always a top and always a bottom. And the feeling of appreciation when you look from the top and understand how fast it can all come crashing down _ it__ more than beautiful and more than words could ever explain.

I don__ believe he deserves the thousands of poems I__e written about him, but life doesn__ follow rules. We do things for people who don__ necessarily deserve it. But we liked it, we loved it and fell in love enough to write about it.

Eventually I__l stop writing about you and it__l be bittersweet. Not because I__ not in love with you, but because I__l just love you.

He grabbed my hand and that__ when I felt my heart beat for the very first time.

We were both smiling, in that bittersweet way one does when imagining something the heart longs for and the head would dread.