epigrams

With regard to things such as independence, mental capabilities, and sexuality, a very old man is nothing but a gigantic infant with white hair and wrinkles.

Some women__ greatest achievement is sleeping with a man who is rich, famous, and/or wanted by many women, whereas some women__ greatest achievement is refusing to sleep with such a man.

A truly compassionate man gives a poor woman a portion of his meal before he eats, not after he has eaten.

Some social ills are preserved by the common misbelief that things such as ignorance, greed, and stupidity do not have the stamina required to reach old age.

Some people have contracted HIV during their separate endeavours to give someone or some people a curable STD.

Famine sometimes increases the number of people who are overweight.

An expensive coffin does not decrease the deceased__ chances of going to hell.

Unless they are off duty, no matter how wide it is, and even when it is sincere, a smile seems fake if the job description of the person who is smiling includes smiling.

You cannot be truly humble, unless you truly believe that life can and will go on without you.

The kind of lies that someone tells us gives us an idea of how stupid, knowledgeable, intelligent, or ignorant they are _ or they think we are.

Many a death was precipitated by the food, the job, or the medication whose main function was to postpone it.

When in court, the primary role of lawyers is not to prove or disprove innocence; unbeknown to almost all lawyers and their clients, it is to save the court time.

The death of a billionaire is worth more to the media than the lives of a billion poor people.

We all have problems. Or rather, everyone has at least one thing that they regard as a problem.

One of the main functions of a push-up bra is to lower the number of mothers who seem like mothers.

Being bored is the price we pay for not being insane.

We are loved way more by some of the people who have not contacted us in the last twelve or so months than we are loved by some of those who contact us every twelve or so days _ or hours.

Plants are more courageous than almost all human beings: an orange tree would rather die than produce lemons, whereas instead of dying the average person would rather be someone they are not.