humor

The __oons had enjoyed a real party, and my trashcan had been the piñata! They__ obviously indulged in an evening of feasting on our wares and then staggered off the property loaded up with our birdseed as a little take-home gift!

It is a wonderful thing to be liked by a stranger, but without respect it is pointless. It is like pulling the pedals off a rose and throwing the stem at the person you like. It__ creepy, but had good intentions that suddenly experienced some strange form of verticillium wilt, during the climate change of their mood.

The face that greeted me, however, was far from welcoming, it was a miniature stick insect of a woman with wiry white hair and enormous glasses that emphasized her heavily wrinkled face. She blinked twice and looked me up and down. By the look on her face, she wasn__ that impressed with what she saw. __ho is it, Ethel?__he responded, __t__ some homeless woman. She looks like she needs money and a good wash._ And I thought I__ already reached the lowest point of my day.

I believe books should be like a prime rib steak ~ good and thick.

God is the creator of all good plot twists!

How is Mrs. Rivers doing?' asked the agent, a very tall and large man, well-dressed, bald and depressing, with a manner of gliding into his office from a side door without perceptibly moving his feet which had struck terror into many young writers and caused them to accept the lowest terms Mr. Hobb could offer.

To answer your question as honestly as I can, I've wanted since I was very little to not have to worry about money. I've never been poverty-level poor (I mean, there's been years where I've been officially beneath the poverty line, but that wasn't poverty: that was being a student and living the Student Lifestyle), but I've been in a place where you know you can't afford a better-quality food, where you can't do certain things because of money, and I'd prefer not to have those problems if I can. I sort of have troubles with money in general, with how it determines so much of our lives but with how we all try to ignore it, but I would like to be (and stay) in a place where I can pick up some new comics and games and not worry about how much they cost.This is terrible; you're asking me where I want to be in the future, what I want my life to be like, and the only thing I can tell you is "Man, all I know is I don't want to be POOR.

My people, we stay indoors. We have keyboards. We have darkness.

I have high hopes for the book and have already made a down payment on a Ferrari. Well, it__ actually a small metal model of a Ferrari, kind of like a Dinky Toy, but a little bit bigger.

The problem with taxation is that authors can't write off whiskey as a business expense.

That friend of hers has got to go, though. You're lucky you got stuck with that Dexter guy instead of

When she got back from taking Cassie to school Fancy knew that she ought to be working on her wilderness romance. She had promised thirty thousand words to her editor by tomorrow, and she had only written eleven. Specific

You know the look: genius gone to pot, and ready to join the Communist Party

I suppose half the time Shakespeare just shoved down anything that came into his head.

One does not go to Moscow to get fat.

A writer is congenitally unable to tell the truth and that is why we call what he writes fiction.

All writers are insane!

Every author really wants to have letters printed in the paper. Unable to make the grade, he drops down a rung of the ladder and writes novels.