l-appel-du-vide

Isn__ everyone on the planet or at least everyone on the planet called me stuck between the two impulses of wanting to walk away like it never happened and wanting to be a good person in love, loving, being loved, making sense, just fine? I want to be that person, part of a respectable people, but I also want nothing to do with being people, because to be people is to be breakable, to know that your breaking is coming, any day now and maybe not even any day but this day, this moment, right now a plane could fall out of the sky and crush you or the building you__e in could just crumble and kill you or kill the someone you love_ and to love someone is to know that one day you__l have to watch them break unless you do first and to love someone means you will certainly lose that love to something slow like boredom or festering hate or something fast like a car wreck or a freak accident or flesh-eating bacteria_ and who knows where it came from, that flesh-eating bacteria, he was such a nice-looking fellow, it is such a shame_ and your wildebeest, everyone__ wildebeest, just wants to get it over with, can__ bear the tension of walking around the world as if we__e always going to be walking around the world, because we__e not, because here comes a cancer, an illness a voice in your head that wants to jump out a window, a person with a gun, a freak accident, a wild wad of flesh-eating bacteria that will start with your face.