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The Englishman has all the qualities of a poker except its occasional warmth.

I regard England as my wife and America as my mistress.

Socialism has been preached for so long the British people no longer have any sense of personal responsibility.

Oh it's a snug little island! A right little tight little island!

The Englishman respects your opinions but he never thinks of your feelings.

The English never draw a line without blurring it.

I find the Englishman to be him of all men who stands firmest in his shoes.

The most dangerous thing in the world is to make a friend of an Englishman because he'll come sleep in your closet rather than spend 10 shillings on a hotel.

The House of Lords is a model of how to care for the elderly.

Land of hope and glory Mother of the Free How shall we extol thee who are borne of thee? Wider still and wider shall thy bounds be set God who made thee mighty make thee mightier yet.

England has forty-two religions and only two sauces.

In the end it may well be that Britain will be more honoured by the historians for the way she disposed of an empire than for the way in which she acquired it.

What should they know of England who only England know?

That typically English characteristic for which there is no English name -esprit de corps.

You must not miss Whitehall. At one end you'll find a statue of one of our kings who was beheaded at the other the monument to the man who did it. This is just an example of our attempts to be fair to everybody.

The House of Lords is like a glass of champagne that has stood for 5 days.

The nice sense of measure is certainly not one of Nature's gifts to her English children ... we have all of us yielded to infatuation at some moment of our lives.

The Lord Chief Justice of England recently said that the greater part of his judicial time was spent investigating collisions between propelled vehicles each on its own side of the road each sounding its horn and each stationary.