Being comfortable with the lies can be catastrophic.
MAKING THE LIE MAKE SENSE:When denial (his or ours) can no longer hold and we finally have to admit to ourselves that we__e been lied to, we search frantically for ways to keep it from disrupting our lives. So we rationalize. We find __ood reasons_ to justify his lying, just as he almost always accompanies his confessions with __ood reasons_ for his lies. He tells us he only lied because_. We tell ourselves he only lied because_. We make excuses for him: The lying wasn__ significant/Everybody lies/He__ only human/I have no right to judge him.Allowing the lies to register in our consciousness means having to make room for any number of frightening possibilities:_ He__ not the man I thought he was._ The relationship has spun out of control and I don__ know what to do_ The relationship may be over. Most women will do almost anything to avoid having to face these truths. Even if we yell and scream at him when we discover that he__ lied to us, once the dust settles, most of us will opt for the comforting territory of rationalization. In fact, many of us are willing to rewire our senses, short-circuit our instincts and intelligence, and accept the seductive comfort of self-delusion.
When Your Lover Is a Liar: Healing the Wounds of Deception and Betrayal
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MAKING THE LIE MAKE SENSE:When denial (his or ours) can no longer hold and we finally have to admit to ourselves that we__e been lied to, we search frantically for ways to keep it from disrupting our lives. So we rationalize. We find __ood reasons_ to justify his lying, just as he almost always accompanies his confessions with __ood reasons_ for his lies. He tells us he only lied because_. We tell ourselves he only lied because_. We make excuses for him: The lying wasn__ significant/Everybody lies/He__ only human/I have no right to judge him.Allowing the lies to register in our consciousness means having to make room for any number of frightening possibilities:_ He__ not the man I thought he was._ The relationship has spun out of control and I don__ know what to do_ The relationship may be over. Most women will do almost anything to avoid having to face these truths. Even if we yell and scream at him when we discover that he__ lied to us, once the dust settles, most of us will opt for the comforting territory of rationalization. In fact, many of us are willing to rewire our senses, short-circuit our instincts and intelligence, and accept the seductive comfort of self-delusion.
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Not that it was a crazy complicated skill, but operating an espresso machine during high traffic could be added to my repertoire along with card tricks and how to fire a Colt .45.(Quote taken from ARC, subject to change)
There is one kind of laugh that I always did recommend; it looks out of the eye first with a merry twinkle, then it creeps down on its hands and knees and plays around the mouth like a pretty moth around the blaze of a candle, then it steals over into the dimples of the cheeks and rides around in those whirlpools for a while, then it lights up the whole face like the mellow bloom on a damask rose, then it swims up on the air, with a peal as clear and as happy as a dinner-bell, then it goes back again on gold tiptoes like an angel out for an airing, and it lies down on its little bed of violets in the heart where it came from.
But evil is always illusion. It insists on the lie that we can have something for ourselves. This is the sole principle at work in hell. Lucifer chose to believe it; or, since it is unimaginable that he actually could have believed it, then we may say that he chose to pretend it might be. Very well, says Truth, you may pretend this. But the pretense will be, literally, your undoing. It will unmake you. You will have opted for something that is not, namely, a lie. Hell is built of lies.
As time moves on the line will blur. It will no longer seem to be the simplicity of good versus evil, but good versus fools who think they are good.
Ritually abusive groups also convince children that something evil has been put inside them. For example, a child is made to believe he or she has a "black heart" - seeing the abuser holding an animal heart and then feeling severe chest pain while it is supposedly inserted. In "brain transplants", the brain of an abuser or of a despised animal such as a rate is supposedly put into a child. Children are told that they are demons or monsters or aliens, or internal copies of an abuser whose "seed" has been implanted by rape.Ch29, p324