falling-apart

Sometimes, you simply must give yourself permission to fall apart.

Sometimes falling apart is the bravest act of all

I'm falling apart, one part after another. Falling down on the world like snow. Half of me is already on the ground, watching from below.

You aren__ falling apart. You__e well beyond that. You__e just rattling along now. Elven dolls doing what little you can to gather the pieces as they fall away. But you don__ know how to properly reattach them__ doll does not repair itself. So you hug those brittle fragments to your chest until you simply cannot hug anymore. Until you__e had to leave so many behind that you no longer remember what it is you__e missing.

Rain makes me feel less alone. All rain is, is a cloud- falling apart, and pouring its shattered pieces down on top of you. It makes me feel good to know I'm not the only thing that falls apart . It makes me feel better to know other things in nature can shatter.

Sometimes it takes falling apart to see exactly how or what loosened the mortar. Sometimes we find we are responsible for the how & the what. As unpleasant as it is when it happens, one cannot help but appreciate these times for what you learn serves as a beacon. Of course this is only half the battle. Which means you're already half way there.

It is a curious thing, watching a strong man fall to pieces.

I guess the whole world is made up of things coming together and things falling apart,

Baby you don__ even know I__ falling apartIn your fun and games, You__e stolen my heart.

For change to occur in us, we must be willing to enter the wilderness of the unknown and to wander in unfamiliar territory, directionless and often in the darkness....We do not need to keep every little thing under control. In fact, we find ourselves only by allowing some falling apart to happen.

Sara," I ask finally, "what do you want from me?""I want to look at you and remember what it used to be like," she says thickly. "I want to go back, Brian. I want you to take me back."But she is not the woman I used to know, the woman who traveled a countryside counting prairie dog holes, who read aloud the classifieds of lonely cowboys seeking women and told me, in the darkest crease of the night, that she would love me until the moon lost its footing in the sky.To be fair, I am not the same man. The one who listened. The one who believed her.

The splendid thingabout falling apartsilently...is thatyou can start overas many timesas you like.

Insanity is everyone expecting you not to fall apart when you find out everything you believed in was a lie.

What do we do after things fall apart? Do we run to the familiar once again? Do we attempt to numb the pain with distractions? What do we do after things fall apart?

Once upon a time I was falling in love. Now I'm only falling apart.

You know what, Sam? We created the council to take pressure off of you. Because you were falling apart.__am just stared at her. Not quite believing she__ said it. And Astrid seemed shocked herself. Shocked at the venom behind her own words.__ didn__ mean_,_ she started lamely, but then couldn__ find her way to explaining just what it was she didn__ mean.Sam shook his head. __ou know, even now, as long as we__e been together it still surprises me that you can be so ruthless.___uthless? Me?___ou will use anyone to get what you want. Say anything to get your way. Why was I ever even in charge?_ He stabbed an accusing finger at her. __ecause of you! Because you manipulated me into it. Why? So I would protect you and Little Pete. That__ all you cared about.___hat__ a lie!_ she said hotly.__ou know it__ the truth. And now you don__ have to bother manipulating me, you can just give me orders. Embarrass me. Undercut me. But as soon as some problem hits, guess what? It__l be, oh, please, Sam, save us.___nything I do, I do for everyone__ good,_ Astrid said.__eah, so you__e not just a genius now, you__e a saint.

I__ mean? That__ the worst you can throw at me?___ean and self-pitying. Does that make it better?___nd what are you, Astrid?_ he shouted. __ smug know-it-all! You point your finger at me and say, __ey, Sam, you make the decisions, and you take all the heat.____h, it__ my fault? No way. I didn__ anoint you.___eah, you did, Astrid. You guilted me into it. You think I don__ know what you__e all about? You used me to protect Little Pete. You use me to get your way. You manipulate me anytime you feel like it.___ou really are a jerk, you know that?___o, I__ not a jerk, Astrid. You know what I am? I__ the guy getting people killed,_ Sam said quietly.Then, __y head is exploding from it. I can__ get my brain around it. I can__ do this. I can__ be that guy, Astrid, I__ a kid, I should be studying algebra or whatever. I should be hanging out. I should be watching TV.__is voice rose, higher and louder till he was screaming. __hat do you want from me? I__ not Little Pete__ father. I__ not everybody__ father. Do you ever stop to think what people are asking me to do? You know what they want me to do? Do you? They want me to kill my brother so the lights will come back on. They want me to kill kids! Kill Drake. Kill Diana. Get our own kids killed.__hat__ what they ask. Why not, Sam? Why aren__ you doing what you have to do, Sam? Tell kids to get eaten alive by zekes, Sam. Tell Edilio to dig some more holes in the square, Sam.__e had gone from yelling to sobbing. ____ fifteen years old. I__ fifteen.__e sat down hard on the edge of the bed. __h, my God, Astrid. It__ in my head, all these things. I can__ get rid of them. It__ like some filthy animal inside my head and I will never, ever, ever get rid of it. It makes me feel so bad. It__ disgusting. I want to throw up. I want to die. I want someone to shoot me in the head so I don__ have to think about everything.__strid was beside him, and her arms were around him. He was ashamed, but he couldn__ stop the tears. He was sobbing like he had when he was a little kid, like when he had a nightmare. Out of control. Sobbing.Gradually the spasms slowed. Then stopped. His breathing went from ragged to regular.____ really glad the lights weren__ on,_ Sam said. __ad enough you had to hear it._____ falling apart,_ he said.Astrid gave no answer, just held him close. And after what felt like a very long time, Sam moved away from her, gently putting distance between them again.__isten. You won__ ever tell anyone___o. But, Sam___lease don__ tell me it__ okay,_ Sam said. __on__ be nice to me anymore. Don__ even tell me you love me. I__ about a millimeter from falling apart again.___kay.

Before New York, the cracks were already there, but now they began to split open and gape, and the difference between how a thing or a place or a person appears and the reality becomes alarmingly visible, garish.